Friday, July 18, 2008

Really... are you that big of an idiot!?

Dumbass McDaniels was driving along like everyone else when he realized... "oh man... I can be a complete ass hole right now!" So he was. Frank McFu**head stops, in the middle of the freeway, and puts his convertible top up... on a sunny day!

Side Note: We're not going to sugar coat this one... this guy is a MORON. We didn't even crop his eyes out... cause he deserves to be known, as a dip sh!t.

Lesson Learned: Richard VonDickhead is the King of all Douches! See You Next Tuesday you bastard... sorry if we offended any real bastards.

"Fornicate-Away" In Stores Now!

For those of you who get laid too much... we have the product for you. It's a full size cape and action figure set sure to kill any sexual attraction in your direction. And for a limited time we can also include the no hanky panky spidey face mask if you call in the next 5 minutes. Call 1-800-Stop-Sex.

Side Note: Let's be honest the dude on the left probably doesn't have this problem... who are we kidding, this entire group never had a problem keeping the sex away!

Lesson Learned: You can't get an STD from an action figure! Superman that hoe!

A Cowgirl Needs Hooker Boots TOO!

Just when you thought hooker moon boots went out of style... bam!... you remembered they were never in style.

Side Note: Marilyn Manson is going to be so pissed when he discovers this lady stole his knee high summer footwear.

Lesson Learned: These boots were not made for walking... in public... or anywhere else!

Thursday, July 17, 2008


No words can do this justice!

Lesson Learned: Parents, please don't let your kids dress themselves... no matter how old!

80's Biker Boy

80's Biker Boy is haven' some fun... 80's Biker Boy doesn't like to run... He rides his bike with funny glasses in the sun... He wears short shorts even when he's done!
It's 80's... Biker... Boooy!!!

Side Note: 80's Biker Boy and The French Ninja are riding buddies!

Lesson Learned: Now that's how you do it! That's how you ride a bike! In the 80's

Good Point... Bad Delivery

Another trucker trying to spread the news of how to live a good life! Well... he's spreading something!

Side Note: The sad thing is, it doesn't look like he rinsed before using... his truck, we're talking about his truck!

Lesson Learned: Truckers have PSA's too... their just a little more vulgar... and usually include golden showers.

Douche For Sale!

Ever wanted to be a douche bag... well here's your chance!  Come on down to D-Bag Chevrolet and make your dreams come true!

Side Note: This douche-mobile comes with air bags and an air head to ride shotgun.  

Lesson Learned: A car dealership can be a douche bag too.

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Man Stranded, No One Cares!

Like Tom Hanks in Castaway, a pedestrian was stranded on one of the Islands of LA... and without Wilson to keep him company.  Where's the Park Ranger when you need him?

Side Note: Does this island look like a paper football to anyone else?

Lesson Learned: The only thing good about LA parks is that they get a lot of traffic!

New Craze Sweeps Across America!

Freeway Bingo is here and lucky for us it's very easy to play!  All you need is one pack of Freeway Bingo cards, one clipboard, one marker and one umbrella... Clearly the woman in the middle is an amateur.

Side Note: Police chases are a free space.

Lesson Learned: If you have enough spare time to watch traffic, you have no excuse for being overweight.

Portal To Africa!

Lets play a little word association... What do you think of when you hear, Africa?  Well if you said giraffes, lions or the world's second-largest and second most-populated continent then you're wrong! 

Side Note: Nothing says Africa like the dark, gloomy, American State of Washington!

Lesson Learned: Besides giraffes belong in the front yards of homes!  At least that's what the Redneck Association of Personal Ethics (R.A.P.E.) says.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008


This was a very serious "fight" going on... but it was the most awkward looking "fight" we have ever seen!  It was like a stuttering pillow fight... with hands!  We're still not sure if any "punches" actually  connected.

Side Note: Stuttering Slap Boxing is the newest event at the D-Bag Olympics.

Lesson Learned: If your going to fight in public, make sure you can fight... cause this was more of a comedy act.  At least everyone watching was laughing!

Our Cream Is Amazing...

We know this marketing ad is a bit forward... but cum on... how could you go wrong for $1.75!?

Side Note: Didn't your mother ever tell you, "They won't buy the cow if they get the milk for free."  At least it's only a free sample... and, "you will LOVE it!!"

Lesson Learned: At least this place isn't next to the giant wiener place... A mall couldn't handle that kind of sexual tension!


We saw this Fatone-A-Like doing security for some random event... Looks like he's having fun... or not.

Side Note: Maybe it is Fat-one... we haven't heard much from Celebrity Circus in a while, is that still on?

Lesson Learned: If you look like Joey Fatone... SHAVE!

Monday, July 14, 2008

This Is One Perverted Company!

What happens to your "Big Horn" if you "Ram" it "Heavy Duty" style?  Only drivers of gas-guzzling Dodge trucks have the answer... and they display that badge proudly.

Side Note: A conversation heard by two men... 
Guy A: "So what you got under the hood?"
Guy B: "A turbo diesel"
Guy A: "Cummins right?"
Guy B: "Every time I drive it!"

Lesson Learned: The only company more horny than Dodge is Disney.  Cummins... Really!?  Sick Bastards!

Asian Mullets... Sweet!

A 3-in-1 haircut!  The Surfer style for the back, the buzz cut on the sides and the spiked look for the top.

Side Note: This is the first Asian to become a member of R.A.P.E. (the Redneck Association of Personal Ethics).

Lesson Learned: People need to start trusting their barbers... well, some people!